(Thanks for taking pics Ben and Ben's roommate!)
And since I'm in a generous mood:
With worsted weight yarn and size 8 needles, cast on 90 sts. Knit 8 rows in 1x1 twisted ribbing with MC. Knit 1 row. Switch to CC, knit 4 rows. Keep switching back and forth between MC and CC knitting 4 rows per stripe.
Row 1: *K7, K2tog* to end of row.
Row 2: *K6, K2tog* to end of row.
Continue like this until 5 stitches remain, pull yarn through. Weave in ends and give to guy in need of hat. Force him to take embarassing pictures modeling said hat.